Editor’s note: This is a guest post by Bobbie Lynn Rider for a summer series highlighting writers who focus on disability.

I rarely have a day that goes as planned.  I may get the big things done, an appointment for example, but the little things go by the wayside more often than not. There is so much I would like to get done, but just can’t.  As I parent a daughter with a disability, I’ve learned my life doesn’t have to be perfectly organized.

1. Roll with the punches

I learned pretty quickly to roll with the punches.  I can be right in the middle of a conversation, stop and take care of my daughter, and not blink an eye.  It can be hard on others, but it doesn’t faze me most of the time.

2. Plan ahead

I learned to take care of business before I  undertake most anything.  I make sure I have an extra change of clothes, extra snacks and drinks, equipment I might need, such as strollers, etcetera, and most importantly a good attitude.  I have to start getting us ready at least 30 minutes before we ever head out the door.  I have to stop and think if I can even take on something new before I say yes to anything.  My daughter moves at a slower pace and that is okay,  realizing this takes the pressure off of both of us.

3. A”To do” list

Keeping “To Do” lists really helps me stay focused each day.  If there is something I need to accomplish on any given day, I try and write it down on my calendar or a post-it note. I will have interruptions, but having things written down helps me to get back on track quickly and remember what I was doing.

4. Letting go

I am learning that some things are not as important as I thought.  I am a rather organized person, by nature, but my life doesn’t have to be perfectly organized.  I live a real life.  I have dust bunnies, I have dirty dishes piled on my counter most days, I need to clean out my closet, and I need to mend or fix something that is still sitting there months later waiting to be worked on.  I do my best, but I know I will not get to everything.

5. Sit and rest

I’ve learned to sit and rest.  Two contemporary Christian songs come to mind: Breathe, by Jonny Diaz, and Just Be Held, by Casting Crowns.

The chorus for Breathe says,

“Breathe, just breathe.

Come and rest at My feet.

And be, just be.

Chaos calls

but all you really need

is to just breathe.”

The chorus for Just Be Held says,

“So when you’re on your knees and answers seem so far away

You’re not alone, stop holding on

and just be held,

Your world’s not falling apart

it’s falling into place.

I’m on the throne stop holding on

and just be held.”

Each of these remind me to take a moment and just be with God.  Sometimes it is okay to sit with my children and just talk or be with them, not always rushing them from one place to another.

Yes, there are important things to be done and tasks that must be accomplished, but my daughter’s disability has been a blessing for me to realize that, sometimes, I need to stop and smell the roses along the way.

God has a way of getting our attention and reminding us of who is really in control.

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Bobbie Lynn Rider blogs at Grace and Fortitude.