Strong willed children. I have one of those. Nichole –my daughter with Down syndrome – knows what she wants, when she wants it, how she wants it. She has no problem yelling at me, “No mom!” “Stop it!” “No way!” As hard as it is to understand her speech, those words are perfectly clear.

Sometimes, I feel like we have a constant battle of the wills. In her room, she kicks the drama, crying, wailing, and sometimes she gets close to the door, to make sure I can hear her laments. I am convinced she thinks I need to apologize for giving her time out, I am the naughty mommy that interfered with her plans. Her, apologize for bad behavior or yelling at mommy? I guess she has no other choice, but to say “I sowy.”

I’ve been trying to potty train Nichole for two years now. The thing about Nichole is that everything she does, she does on her own terms. That strong will coming through in everything she does. She could be wearing big girl undies, she just doesn’t want to, and I can’t make her. There are days she announces, “I big girl” and she goes dry all day, letting me know when she has to go. Then there are days she says, “No big girl, no no, I want Zella” Which means, “put on my Cinderella pull-up.” If we try underwear those days, I am guaranteed accidents all day long.

A few Sundays ago at church, she decided she wanted to dump the sugar container on the little table set up outside our sanctuary. Andy caught her rascal activities and firmly said, “No, you do not dump out the sugar.” “Okay” she responded so sweetly. A few minutes later, she noticed the adults talking in the sanctuary, so she closed the doors, “locking us in.” What does the rascal do? She runs to the sugar container and dumps it onto the table, then it starts spilling to the floor. By the time we saw her, it was too late. Worse thing, she is grinning, like, ha! But of course, as she hears her daddy approach, she turns around and quickly says, “I sowy!”

But here is the thing, the very honest truth about this rascal. I love it. Her strong will and her rascal activities are glimpses to the way she thinks, her thought processes, and a reminder that this little girl is full of potential. She is planning, thinking, scheming ways to get away with what she wants.

Because of her speech, and because she has Down syndrome, we still don’t know the extent of her intellectual capabilities. But as she closes the sanctuary doors, planning her next move to dump out that sugar so we can’t see her, deep down I want to cheer, you are one smart cookie little rascal!

And I am incredibly proud of her doing life on her own terms, because she is showing us that she will achieve anything she sets her mind to.